Solitude is strangely comforting at this point in time. I just want to be left alone with my thoughts.
Still trying to make my goals happen. Kept feeling so stuck. Thinking, is this really what I want?
If I really wanted it, why is it so hard to feel motivated?
I recalled this movie scene in Titanic, where Rose attempted to jump off the ship.
"And all the while I feel like I'm standing in the middle of a crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs, and no one even looks up."
Thats the kind of feeling Im feeling.
Overwhelmed.
Tired.
If life is a puzzle, it felt like Im misplacing all the pieces in this puzzle of life.
I hate the feeling I get when I caught myself wondering : Wtf am I doing?
And then I do it again anyway the next time. ZZz.
There are so many things I want to do, yet don't want to do.
Bloody mid life crisis. Or maybe Im overdosing on Sugar. Haha.
I think I need to go meditate or do a W30 or something.
me too.. at the same stage. nice description "screaming at the top of my lung and no one hears it" but maybe drawing a timeline will help... e.g to attain x baby steps in x amount of time, measure the progress, if fail, what actions to remedy the failure, and this repeats more than 3 times, then time to stop it... not giving it up, but create a brand new goal.... I'll let you know my baby step to be attained by Christmas. :)
ReplyDeleteHa, same! For trading wise, Im tracking my progress until end Dec and see where to go from there!
ReplyDeleteAs for the rest of the stuff I should have done long ago.. time to "eat those frogs"...